I can burry the eye who looks at you with disrespect,
But it seems the world is no place for love like this,
Honor, loyalty, pride and love itself, antiquated terms,
Old fashioned true to the core love, has no place,
in this world of polite facades and empty hearts,
where acceptance is bliss.
Maybe in the next life, I can show you,
How I love you,
This one today will call me crazy,
Bring you dishonor and questions,
If I am gone, it will be easy.
Sometimes events in life are derailing of thought and all plans. You cannot understand how life really is until the one’s who are life are gone. It is a matter of time when you loose the sight of who you are as you realize that whatever you are you saw them in the people you once loved and who loved you. Without that system of checks and balances you are free, but in the worse possible way. A dog without an owner is free but it is no fun. It may work for some but for most it is not ideal. Now as I travel this path alone once again and perhaps for good this time, I wish for strength not company. I don’t wish for help or a shoulder to cry on, I wish for strength. To see through the few good things that are left in me. To at least give comfort the one’s I love that I am not all that bad. If you know me, pray for me, I will be forever grateful.
My greatest wish in life is to help, but my thoughts and life’s practicality could never be balanced. It is not necessary that I do this alone all the way, but it is necessary that I begin this alone and hope that my loved one’s will see it and join me.
To the arrogant my silence may seem as an admittance of guilt. My stiff upper lip is a habit and a necessity. I can string beautiful or ugly sentences just like the hecklers you accompany. The lessons they teach you are honorable and righteous in their appearance alone. The lesson I will teach you is all of that in reality. You have taken an axe to a tree, but you and your army of doom lacks the strength to get through this one. You know gnaw at my spirit thinking it will cave, it won’t.
People tell me about your evil, instead of agreeing I tell them about your good. People are comfortable around you because they are allowed to speak ill of me, people are uncomfortable with me because I refuse to tolerate a cross word about you.
One of us was bound to keep our promises, I am glad that it was me. Soon I will show you how to forgive. That will be final gift to you.